late night party time

i mostly post on my other blog, but i have to say several things:
1: "feminism" doesn't mean you have to say "gentlePERSON" instead of "gentleMAN".
2:i really like fries
3: i may be drunk

august eighteenth, two thousand nine

i was walking past the park yesterday and strewn on the street was the cassette tape insert for melloncollie and the infinite sadness. later on that day we listened to a found CD and it had two old smashing pumpkins bsides that i haven't heard since the days of seattle and 107.7 the end.

hot dog!

today was a good day

when you read the title of this post, you have to say the words in your head like when ice cube is saying it in the song. deal?
ok.
actually today was rather mediocre, but yesterday was a special day. this was because it seemed to balance out perfectly between good and evil.
want more details? alright, here it goes...

bad:
was woken up at 8:30, hung over as hell, to a phone call from rogers telling me that my wireless service would be cut off due to my owing them $480. how was this possible? it seems i hadn't returned some equipment (boys and girls, return your equipment!!)
good:
the rogers guy was super nice and the first words out of his mouth were "i'm sorry for calling you so early"...clearly this guy deserves an award for his phone etiquette. also he told me that if i returned the equipment, the charges would be reversed! sweeeeeeeeeeeet.

bad:
rode my bike to school and was a half hour late because my effing lock felt like being a piece of garbage rather than a functioning piece of necessary bike equipment. also my chain kept getting a stiff link so it was infuriating to ride.

good:
who effing cares about any of that, because it was my last class of my undergraduate degree!!!

bad:
my dog ran away, onto dupont!!!!

good:
i got that little bastard back and he was a-ok

bad:
our sink wasn't draining at all, so we decided maybe if we used the dishwasher that we've never used before that it might a)help the draining or, b)make everything way worse. we gambled and lost, which resulted in a massive flood!

good:
i had beers with my favourite people at the vic to celebrate my last day of school, and also i had fries. and later i had a hot dog. and i got to hang out with my boyfriend.
love life!

malcolm in the middle is very underrated

yup, that's right.

i usually pass by it when i'm enjoying a lazy hangover on the couch. why would i watch a show with that jerk kid who had 15 cars before he was legally allowed to drive? that' s just nonsense, i feel. but what isn't nonsense is my NEW opinion of this show. it's effing great. one thing that used to make me feel rage towards malcolm in the middle is that crazy tv mother of theirs. what an animal.
but then it's like, you pretty much have to appreciate how funny she is. the reason that she's an animal woman is clearly because she's lost all touch with reality due to mothering a bunch of monster children who are likely smarter than her. show smarter, that is- because this isn't reality, people.

justin timberlake wrote a song about me

i've been doing a lot of random crying lately, but i think it's because i'm unemployed and also i'm learning italian and it drives me nuts when i make mistakes, even though you have to make mistakes to get it right in the end.

and also someone special to me works a lot and i am a little bit lonely.

please cry me a river immediately.

angus voltaire and the truth about bacon

please, everyone fall in love with the bacon of the month club. explanation follows.

see, weird bacon stuff has become this crazy new adventure of mine. i was recently at a candy store looking for gummy burgers (with no luck, which incidentally ended in marzipan burgers a la moi) and i found bacon flavoured everything. i was on a budget so i bought bacon flavoured mints for my partner. i tried one and i literally almost puked, which says a lot because i'm pretty sure my stomach is ok with most gross things, probably except brains and tripe.

moving on, i was reading a back issue of bust magazine and there was this section where a couple editors and design-y type contributors gave readers obscure gift ideas. this is actually where my affair began, really. someone at this magazine is my soulmate of humour. one of the gifts she had been peddling was this collectors edition of the big lebowski, and it came in a bowling ball. yes folks, a bowling ball. how effing gross and awesome is that?? anyway so i got it for v, but he really didn't have the reaction i anticipated. it was rather disappointing, although in retrospect i'm pretty sure i got him the present soley for my own witnessing someone else experience what i felt when i came upon such consumer glory. do i learn my lessons? never!

so anyway, my soulmate of humour at bust magazine suggested the 'bacon of the month' club. whaaaa?? yup, you get a different kind of obscure bacon delivered to your door, once a month. then you also get things like a newsletter and a t-shirt and even a pen, but really all i care about is the weird bacon delivery.

bay-cone

anyway, wouldn't this be the grossest and most awesome birthday present of all time? ya-huh. i feel that if they would be so inclined to ship outside of the states then my life would finally have meaning. maybe i'll just show up at v's door in a fancy outfit with a pack of bacon every month. DIY recession bacon club birthday.

for the record, the woman with all these brilliant gift ideas is named callie watts, and she is apparently the 'customer service/craft lady" for bust. can i work with you, please? hey, i almost forgot to put the website, even though it's hyperlinked up there for y'all. but whatevs. go to www.gratefulpalate.com and have your life changed, but only if you live where obama reigns.